Here we go again…

I have to preface this blog with the fact that I have the sweetest, most caring, sometimes silliest, and most loving daughter in the world.

With that said I have to say that she is not my most well adjustable child. She never has been {but hopefully someday will be}.

You know when you see babies out and about and they will just smile at everyone who turns and eye at them. Nope, not Dallas. She was always the baby to take it all in. She would closely examine {from a distance} who was paying her attention and not even crack a smile until she felt comfortable. Definitely not trusting from first sight, which I guess is a good trait to have in a way…she gets that from her Daddy. I’m way too trusting.

She is also a very stubborn child…bless her heart, she gets that from both sides. But then again, we all have a stubborn side to us I think. And, she doesn’t do all that well with change. If she has something in her head, it’s going to be that way or Heaven help us with the fit that will come to boot.

She is completely like I was as a child. She likes to play by herself, she’s very caring, and loving, very shy {even though we try not to use that word around her}, and she loves being with her Mama {I love that part…to an extent}.

So looking at this, I think this could describe any warm-blooded six year old child out there. Yes?

Well, here’s my dilemma.

She faces separation anxiety like no tomorrow. It started when she was 4 and we gave up her paci. We had some sleep issues and after two weeks of screaming and no sleep I took her to the doctor. He said it separation anxiety and instructed me to basically be “Super Nanny”. I did as instructed and we went through the whole “cry it out” and self-soothing phase once again.

We got back to normal and all was smooth sailing…until there was a change. It’s become a pattern and now she’s 6 and here we go again.

I’ve realized that if Eric and I go away for a weekend, the minute we come home and my parents leave we go through this “phase”. She cries and screams and wants me and needs me and says she scared and can’t go to sleep. I have to sit in the bonus room and come check on her every two minutes until she falls asleep…this lasts for at least and hour and a half.

Well, she’s at it again. It started the other night. She said she’s scared of witches…{a silly book her teacher is reading}. I finally got her to sleep and emailed the teacher. He’s so wonderful and made accommodations for her to play on the computer during reading time so she doesn’t have to hear the story. Well, she did it again last night and then I realized it’s not the book…it’s separation anxiety.

She just tracked back in from being out for 2 1/2 weeks. She did this the last track out time, and whenever Eric and I are away…it’s mostly being away from me. When she’s home, which I love having her home, she is touching me day in and day out. Like I said, she loves her Mama.

Today she started fussing that school was “boring” and she wasn’t going to go to school. After some crying and fit throwing {from her…not me} I got out of her that she doesn’t like doing the computer because no one else does and she feels embarrassed. Ding, ding, ding, it’s not the book it’s separation anxiety.

It’s so sad and frustrating at the same time. There is no convincing her that she is safe, happy, and loved when she gets in this state of mind. She is fine during the day but at night when the light goes off, she is one not happy camper.

I have to be honest here and tell you that it really tries my patience and as hard as I try not to sometimes I lose my cool. Maybe it’s because I’m so sad that I can’t help her…I don’t know.

So any of you friends out there with psychology degrees, please help a sista out and tell me that she’s not going to be twenty and not going to college because she can’t leave her Mama.

I love my daughter more than life itself…it’s not too much for this Mama to want my sweet little girl to be happy is it? Maybe I’m just tired…